Sometimes we can’t find a satisfying compensation for inner pain. In discomfort, first we choose the easily accessible; work, security, relationships, sex, shopping, power, image, status, etc. Eventually we discover that what’s of the earth is found to be inadequate, unsatisfactory. So, while we are caught in the human endeavor to avoid suffering and find the antidote of pleasure, eventually we realize its futility as a game never won.
I find the inner Ping-Pong game when I’m bouncing in thoughts between, ‘I don’t want this or that’ and, ‘If only I…’ or, ‘I wish…’ These thoughts are the language of loss. What’s one to do?
Number one is awareness of the mind’s pattern.
Second, to begin to identify when it is operating.
Thirdly, to decide what I’ll do to stop the Ping-Pong ball of emotional reaction to just about everything.
I also found the basic ‘voice’ of the Ping-Pong pattern is ‘I want…’ under every ‘I don’t want…’
I realize our pattern as the two players being No Suffering and Constant Pleasure. It is a great help to calm the confusion of a wining-less yo-yo game of the uninhibited mind through simple awareness.
My childhood left me with an inner, nearly ceaseless cry from deep within my soul and heart, ‘I want…’ Going into daily prayer and meditation has surfaced self-realization of what’s within. What an adventure of discovery of what I didn’t want to see, but learned to love it. My Greatest Discovery is that Something Higher than everything helped me lift above them; I am lifted from an immature marriage. I am lifted from depression and anxiety, from workaholism, from loneliness. Maybe the greatest lifting was from not knowing patterns of the mind, to living receptive to That which is above all patterns and other ‘wants.’
Yet, the human dilemma being what it is, even in a relationship with my Higher Power, the game continues into another realm of wanting this and that, not from the earth, but from what is Eternal. Eventual peace shall be when I’m so secure in That relationship that there need be no thought for, ‘I want…’ All shall have been satisfied in my trusting receptivity to all that is, for What lifts me, is above all else.
What if simply the realization of the pattern between suffering and the insatiable pleasure reveals the same pattern purpose; we can rise above all through relationships? Without understanding we feel caught in a sense of a going nowhere pattern. Instead of living unconsciously, let’s consciously lift it all to understand the same pattern as The Big Squeeze; Everything squeezes us into The Above All Else – being loved.